Today’s theme is … TOP 5 TUESDAY!!!
Top 5 Episodes of Inbetweeners
(note that if you don’t know what Inbetweeners is, stop whatever the fuck you are doing, turn on Netflix, and start watching)
“Exam Time” Will drinks a lot of Red Bull and shits himself in an exam. Jay has a girlfriend but gets too clingy and dumps her. Then he cries about it and says that she broke up with him because his “cock was too big for her.”
“Bunk Off” The guys skip school to get drunk. Simon calls Carly “babes” and pukes on her brother.
“The Gig and the Girlfriend” Simon meets a cute girl and tells her he will bring puff (our old friend Mary Jane) to a gig. They get tea, then actual puff. Then they smoke it. Except Neil. He’s getting high on cough syrup or something. Will eats a whole bunch of weed and has weird arm spasms.
“Home Alone” When Will’s mom goes away for the weekend, the guys vandalize flowers, eat a lot of toast, and assault Will’s neighbour.
Top 5 Justin Timberlake Songs That He Didn’t Sing at His Concert
(also, Justin it’s been two weeks since I confessed my love to you at your concert… the ball is in your court now baby)
Gimme What I Don’t Know I Want
Top 5 Justin Timberlake Songs That He Did Sing at His Concert
There is no chance in hell I can only choose 5.
(I sincerely hope JT doesn’t randomly find my blog, see my forty posts devoted to him, and then feel the need to eliminate me as a stalker Hunger Games style – a fight to the death with 23 other creepy JT stalkers)
Top 5 Things To Do In My Hometown
Eat chinese food
Top 5 Dreamiest Guys Of All Time Ever
Justin Timberlake (uh duh)
Any guy with well-maintained scruff (see below image of Gene Kelly, even studlier with facial hair).
You know, I am missing a few. It’s okay, famous men, you’re all gorgeous.
Honourable mention to that super hot guy I was talking to outside a bar in Edmonton a few weekends ago (he was very Khal Drogo from Game of Thrones but blonde and less caveman, more I’m wearing this cardigan and long hair in a ponytail like a man who could very well be on Game of Thrones)
Top 5 Years Of My Life
2014 – Premature, I know but I have been reading a lot of horoscopes lately and this is *so* going to be my year.
1991 – The year I was born.
2009 – The year I went to university and had to grow up. Aaaaaand I guess I met a few cool people that year.
2007 – The year I kicked ass at school. Grade 10 was my bitch!
1994 – The year my brother was born. Not because I was stoked to get a brother but because I realized I now had someone to take the blame for all of my bad behaviour.
Top 5 Things I Like To Learn About
Films from the 20th century
Music (mostly rock music, sorry Justin Bieber)
The Italian Renaissance
Top 5 Embarrassing Things I Did This Past Weekend
I burped loudly at a hockey game (in front of work colleagues). For you to understand, I would have to tell you about how I was a little drunk and how I kind of forgot where I was and how I am awesome at burping… but I’m not one to delve into details.
I stayed in bed watching Netflix until 5:00pm.
I cried laughing three times while watching Netflix (Parks and Recreation is my weakness).
I did not do anything productive like cleaning or paying bills or finding my missing copy of Kurt Vonnegut’s Breakfast of Champions or showing any responsibility.
I did not pluck my eyebrows. That doesn’t sound like a doozy but you have not seen my eyebrows.
Tuesdays suck… until now!